The new seaman
The Navy Chief noticed a new seaman in the crew and barked at him “Get over here! What’s your name?”
“Paul, sir” the new seaman replied.
“Look, I don’t care what kind of bleeding heart, pansy crap they’re teaching sailors at boot camp these days, but I don’t call anyone by his first name!” the Chief scowled. “It breeds familiarity and that leads to a breakdown in authority. I refer to my sailors by their last names only: Smith, Jones, Baker. And I am to be referred to only as ‘Chief.’ Do I make myself clear?”
“Aye, aye, Chief”
“Now that we have that straight, what’s your last name?!!”
“Darling, sir, my name is Paul Darling, Chief”
“Okay, Paul, here’s what I want you to do….”