Archive for the ‘Technology’ Category
Just Trying to be Helpful
Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A mobile phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands-free speaker- function and begins to talk.
Everyone else in the room stops to listen….
MAN: “Hello”
WOMAN: “Honey, it’s me, are you at the club?”
MAN: “Yes”
Understanding Engineers
Take One
Two engineering students were biking across the campus when one said, “Where did you get such a great bike?”
The second engineer replied, “Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, ‘Take what you want.’”
IT’S STILL x86 TO ME
(To the tune of Billy Joel’s “It’s Still Rock and Roll To Me”)
What’s the matter with the chip I’m using?
Can’t you tell that it’s not pipelined?
Maybe I should buy an 8087
Welcome back to the days offline.
Where have you been hiding out lately honey?
Your system can’t crawl ’til you spend a lot of money.
Everybody’s talkin’ ’bout the new chip
Funny but it’s still x86 to me
What’s the matter with the RAM I’m using?
Can’t you tell that it’s FPM?
Maybe I should get an ISA RAM-card?
Are you gonna use an MFM?
Nowadays you can’t be too buckaroo
You’re best bet’s an Itanium, Opteron too…
Hot RISC, Cool CISC, BIOS patch on old disks,
it’s still x86 to me.
Oh it doesn’t matter what they say in white papers
Cause it’s always been the same old scene.
There’s a new chip on deck
But you can’t get the specs from a story in a magazine…
Aimed at a counter of beans
How about an SL notebook
with a cadmium batt’ry pack?
Well you could really use a good old Kaypro
if it didn’t dislocate your back.
Don’t waste your money on a fast compiler,
you’ll get more mileage from a network filer.
SX, DX, Linux, Cyrix,
It’s still x86 to me.
What’s the matter with a BBS?
Don’t you know that that’s out of touch?
Should I get a looped T3 connection?
If you do then you’ve got too much.
Don’t you know about the new fashion, honey?
All you need is time and twenty bucks of money.
Cyrix, Pentium, Itanium and Opteron
It’s still x86 to me.
Everybody’s talkin’ ’bout the new chip
Funny, but it’s still x86 to me.
Yellow, Pink, and Green
Mujibar was trying to get into the USA legally through Immigration.
The INS officer said, “Mujibar, you have passed all the tests, except there is one more test. Unless you pass it, you cannot enter the United States of America.”
Mujibar said, “I am ready.”